Onions and Butterfingers

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M was given a chore to do: peel the potatoes, (do not cut) and put in the pot. For whatever reason (anger, ignorance, control) he proceeded to chop the potatoes and cut them like we do for roasted potatoes. Never mind that there was a POT beside him instead of a baking dish. As I nailed him on it he said he heard me and then forgot. Allrighty then. He proceeded to give himself the consequence of cutting the skin off each little potato slice. Nice. That shouldn’t take too long. S and I went for a walk and when I got back he had finished but needed more potatoes. I told him to peel them and put them in the pot. Of course, he had to wash them first, because that’s how we always do it. No, it’s not, but you feel free to think that, son. Our daily adventures in the art of dinner. Almost an hour to peel a few potatoes. Good thing I put the chicken in the crock pot 7 hours ago! And yes, he denied the whole time doing it on purpose. Really didn’t matter. The consequence was the same. Doing it my way could lead to feeling better about himself and being part of the family. Doing it his way gave him control and kept him alone.

So what on earth does onions and butterfingers mean? That’s straight from my daughter’s mouth. As we walked around the neighborhod I couldn’t resist an opportunity for her to see how far she’s come and for me to get into a RAD mind. So we talk about M and why he did the deal with the potatoes. She tells me it’s just like onions and butterfingers. Butterfingers are her favorite candy bar and M just loves onions. They repel each other. One you enjoy having and being around (Butterfingers and S) and one smells, is messy and turns you off (onions and M). With an onion you have to peel back the layers. It takes time and makes you cry. But when you cook it in a recipe (family) it tastes good and adds flavor. Oh my little therapist in training! (Okay the basic idea was hers and I elaborated just a bit. Still, sometimes she just nails it!)

Image: Carlos Porto / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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  1. Whoa. Now that was a cool conversation. I never looked at my kids like onions.

    A little therapist indeed….


  2. marythemom says:

    You and S are both smart cookies! Mmm, now I’m really hungry.

    Great analogy. Thanks.
    Mary in TX

  3. Very smart! Does she make house calls, because our 14 year old is totally makin us crazy with his passive aressive stuff….

  4. She is going to make one heck of a therapist!! 🙂

  5. Wow! That’s awesome.

    I have 2 adopted siblings. My S is like your S. My R is your M. Oh so hard.

    🙂 🙂 🙂

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